The value
“I want to be helpful.” This describes a direction that matters to you.
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Turn a personal value into a clear, realistic guide for your own behavior. Check what the standard requires, how it respects care and boundaries, and what you will do when you miss it or circumstances change.
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A personal standard is a chosen guide for your own behavior, such as checking your capacity before agreeing to a task. A useful standard is specific, realistic, and consistent with care and respect for others. It includes a way to address a missed step or changed circumstances.
A standard can help express a value. If you first want to identify the value, use My Code of Ethics, Morals, Values, and Standards.
“I want to be helpful.” This describes a direction that matters to you.
“Before agreeing to an extra task, I will check my time, responsibilities, and capacity.” This describes your action.
“The other person will feel supported.” You can consider their needs, but their feelings and decisions are not completely under your control.
A standard should give you something to do and review. “Everyone must approve of me” does not describe a behavior you can make others perform.
Fictional example: Tessa values helping family and believes, “A reliable person always says yes.” Tessa agrees to an extra errand on an already full appointment day, then cannot keep both commitments.
Tessa chooses a clearer standard: “Before I agree to an extra task, I will check my calendar and what I can manage.” When the next request arrives, Tessa pauses, checks the schedule, and says, “I cannot do that today. I can help on Friday if that works for you.”
The family member may need someone else. Tessa’s standard supports a more realistic answer; it cannot guarantee the request will be met or the person will be pleased.
Did Tessa stop valuing helpfulness? No. Tessa chose a way to consider help without making an unworkable agreement.
What action can Tessa review? Whether the calendar and capacity were checked before agreeing, and whether the reply was accurate about availability.
A chosen standard does not replace clinical advice, a professional duty, a legal obligation, or an agreed responsibility. Get qualified guidance when these affect the decision; this worksheet cannot determine which rule takes priority.
Use a working sentence: “When ___, I will ___, with ___ support. If I miss it or the conditions change, I will review ___ and discuss ___ with the appropriate person.”
A missed step may need a correction, an apology, a revised arrangement, or a closer look at the resources available. Respond to the actual effect. Avoid a new sweeping promise made only to escape discomfort.
Review standards that require constant availability, hiding symptoms, never asking for help, or controlling someone else’s response. A useful guide should make the next responsible action clearer. It should not make care something you must earn.
For a clinical concern or persistent change in functioning, speak with a qualified provider. Keep medication and treatment decisions with the appropriate care team.
This optional reflection is unscored. Use Tessa’s example or a low-stakes choice. You may leave fields blank and omit names or sensitive details. The page does not contact your team. Entries may be lost when you leave or refresh; protect saved or printed copies.
For supporters: be clear about an agreement and its effects. You can keep a boundary and ask for suitable follow-through without requiring constant availability or assigning a degrading label.
For facilitators: use Tessa’s example, allow a pass, and ask which part of the standard is observable. Discuss fit and responsibilities rather than ranking whose standards are highest.
Current clients should discuss care concerns directly with their team. For non-emergency program information, contact Alpine admissions.
A goal describes an outcome you want to work toward. A personal standard describes how you intend to act in a situation. Make the behavior clear enough to review.
No. A useful standard fits the value, the responsibilities involved, and real conditions. An extreme rule may be unclear or unworkable rather than more responsible.
Yes. Review why it needs changing and how the change affects other people and agreements. Get qualified guidance when clinical, legal, or professional responsibilities are involved.
Describe the actual action and effect. Consider a correction, communication, repair, or revision, and check what resources or support were missing. One missed step does not describe your whole worth.
It guides your own choices and responses. You can make a request or state a boundary, but another person’s agreement, consent, or feelings remain theirs.
The scenario and standard-writing exercise are original educational tools. They are not a character score, a professional code, or individualized clinical or legal advice.
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Reflect on values, strengths, and the life you want to build in recovery.
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